RETURN ON WISDOM
RE-TURN ON WISDOM
#7 ON INVISIBLE DISABILITY & HUMANITY
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#7 ON INVISIBLE DISABILITY & HUMANITY

The Silent Struggles We Don’t See
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Hey good human, 

This post is hard to write but deeply necessary to share with you. 

This week we dive into stories of being a mother to a disabled child, facing extreme trauma and PTSD, and finding joy, hope, humanity and belonging in it all.  All in under 15 minutes.  

Dee is a warrior woman. I first met Dee when I lived in Lennox Head, her holistically healthy life wisdom immediately drew me in, and our connection went a few clicks deeper quite quickly (standard for me). Her life stories were powerful—stories that needed to be shared. You see, Dee is, a walking library of lived experience wisdom. 

I didn’t anticipate how close to home Dee’s journey would feel for me. 

I have a best friend, Brooke, whose baby boy, Hugo, was diagnosed with a brain tumour at just 10 weeks old. As I listened to Dee talk about her son’s brain tumour diagnosis at the exact same age, I was struck by two completely different stories and journeys, but with heartbreakingly cruel moments of similarity.

Extreme trauma and grief can be polarising and isolating. There's something sacred about connecting with someone who has walked a similar path, even if their journey is uniquely theirs.

Dee has been a generous confidante and safe space for my friend Brooke - an intergenerational connection that reminds us that we can live, learn, and pass on our lived experience wisdom to help other walkers on their way.

This is why sharing our stories is so vital. It helps others learn and grow. It helps us navigate the complexities of life. It permits us to witness one another, in our full humanity.

‘When you have a sick child, your world shrinks. People don't know what to say. People see disability as something sad’

There are so many silent struggles we don’t see in our fellow humans.

What does it feel like to be a mother of a son with an invisible disability? How do we communicate something that others can’t easily see? How is it, that grief feels invisible on the outside to others, but the heaviest weight on the inside?

This episode shows us that one small act of inclusion can restore someone’s entire faith in humanity and community. And change someones entire life. The ripple effect.

When I trained as a death doula I was gifted a piece of language that I often gift to others:

‘Strong back, soft front’

We need the strength to stand in the chaos of life's complexities, but equally, we need the softness to access the kindness, patience, and compassion available to us all.

And there is strength in advocacy. Brain cancer needs more funding and research - one Australian is diagnosed with brain cancer every 5 hours (!). And brain cancer kills more Australian children than any other disease. We need to keep sharing these stories, as an advocacy tool, to drive understanding and awareness.

So, now is the time to expand your capacity for empathy. 15 minutes of your day to access the purest form of humanity. The lows, the highs, and everything in between - some that others can’t, or will never see.

Thank you for being part of the RE-TURN ON WISDOM community that listens, learns, and values lived experience wisdom

Take care and take risk, 

Nim

PS. Two important asks for you after you listen:

  1. Pay it forward and Thank Dee. You can reply to this email or via the comments - share with Dee how this story impacted you. Reading your responses is a big and validating highlight for guests.

  2. Support the Hugo Sunshine Fund. Research to cure childhood brain cancer, powered by Hugo Long’s incredible legacy. For Hugo, always 🦅

Every action you take today helps me keep these important conversations going.

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RETURN ON WISDOM
RE-TURN ON WISDOM
A storytelling project: chats with people who have lived over 18,000 days.
Let’s re-connect to our most valuable resources: wisdom and time.
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Nim de Swardt